Musings on life, parenting, Jesus, and more...

The last time I was in Seattle was a few years ago, and even then I made the comment that it seemed much cleaner than Portland does these days. I moved to the Portland area in 2004 after graduating from the University of Oregon in the Eugene. I grew up in North Idaho, and visited Seattle on a few occasions. I knew about the homeless problem, heroin addiction. Seattle had kind of a bad wrap to be honest. When I first moved to Portland area, I loved it. I would go down to events on the Portland waterfront, and frequent restaurants and bars in the city. However, since Covid and the riots, it’s really gone downhill. In my opinion, Portland is far worse these days. I know they are trying to find housing for the unhoused population, and from what I hear from sources on the inside, they are successfully doing that. However, in the meantime, the city still remains an eyesore and for me personally, does not feel like a safe place to visit. It would actually be a fun comparison after spending a ...

Today would have been my dad’s 77th birthday. It also happens to be Father’s Day - a beautiful, sunny Sunday here in Oregon. Yesterday I watched my daughter play beach volleyball under a warm summer sky. Today, I’m sitting on the sidelines of my son’s baseball tournament, soaking in the joy of family, sunshine, and the ordinary magic of weekend routines. On the surface, everything feels peaceful and full. And yet, beneath it all, there’s a quiet ache. I miss my dad. Grief is a strange and unpredictable thing. One minute you’re fine, the next minute the cat leaves you a dead bird on your front doorstep and you’re bawling your eyes out. I know I’m not the first to say it, and I won’t be the last, but I’m deeply grateful that we can hold two truths at once. Life rarely exists in black and white. It’s the “both/and” that shapes our richest experiences. I am both incredibly grateful for this weekend, and also profoundly sad. I miss my dad’s presence, especially on days like today. But I...

I don’t know if many of you know this about me, but I have battled depression at different times over my life, starting in adolescence when I would self harm with razor blades and lighters, and at the age of 15, attempted to take my own life by drinking alcohol and swallowing a bottle of sleeping pills. God had a plan for my life though, and despite my attempt to end it, he has managed to protect me and get me this far (46 years!), thank you Jesus. Depression hit hard again in my 30’s, with three small children and a failing marriage. I once again turned to self harm, but not in the same way as my teenage years.  Through years of therapy, lots of prayer, self help books and podcasts, journaling (LOTS of journaling), and many other tips and tools that I’m going to list below, I have found a way to thrive and enjoy life without depression and without antidepressant pharmaceuticals.  I’m not against the use of antidepressants - I think they can be a great tool to help get people ...