Posts

Taking Offense

This has been on my heart to write about for a while now.  I learned the concept in therapy, to assume that those that love and care about us have good intentions and aren’t specifically out to hurt us.  Inevitably in any relationship, feelings get hurt and offenses do happen. But I don’t think they need to happen as much as they do. And I think that text and email have contributed to an increase in misunderstandings and offenses. If you find yourself taking offense easily, or feeling like people close to you don’t like you or are purposely out to hurt you, I highly encourage you to seek therapy. This can be a trauma response resulting from unhealed emotional or psychological issues.  This is really the first step, because what I’m about to share next wouldn’t have helped me before I did my own self-healing. You need to believe in yourself and see yourself as a good person, worthy of love and kindness.  You ARE!  You are a good person, worthy of love and kindness, in case no one has to

Making Lemonade

While the year hasn’t necessarily started off with all good things, I feel proud of myself and my emotional maturity for the way I’ve been able to navigate and pivot among some unfortunate events. First, my MacBook screen stopped working on my laptop. My work laptop. The one I use to prepare tax returns, and I’m trying to get ready for tax season. Not the best timing. Reminds me of a few years ago in early January when my website went down and I had to scramble to make a new one while sitting at one of my daughters volleyball tournaments on a weekend. Next, I started working on my personal tax return to make sure I was on track with my own estimated tax payments and came to the conclusion that I am going to owe about $12,000, when I was expecting that amount to be more like $2,000. Yay for more business and more revenue, not so much for the more in taxes part 😬 Then, around 9:30 last night, I happened to check my email before bed and learned that my credit card had been skimmed and th

Beauty

During my quiet time with the Lord this morning I was praying for my girls. They are 12 and 15 years old. When I look at them, I see such strong, beautiful, kind, smart, amazing humans! Physically, they are fit and athletic. At their doctor checkups, they are right where they are supposed to be in terms of height, weight and BMI.  But because of our genetics, we all have a little junk in the trunk if ya know what I mean 🍑 As a 44 year old woman, I can look at my daughters and their friends, and see the beauty in all the different body types that God has created. But as a teenager myself, I felt fat, ugly and unattractive. I’m sure this was perpetuated by my 125 lb mother constantly talking about her body in a negative way. If she thought she was fat, then I definitely was fat at 155lbs (my teenage weight) and let’s not even talk about what I weigh now! And while I know health wise, it would benefit me to lose another 30-40 lbs, overall I am content in the body God created me in. I hav

Contentment

I love my life. I love my kids. I love my career, and my clients, and the friendships both old and new that have developed over the years. And looking back in my life, at least the last 15-20 years, I’ve always felt blessed and fortunate. Sure there have been ups and downs along the way, but when I take a step back and look at my life as a whole, I feel satisfied and happy. I wish I could say the same about the world around me, but honestly when I take a step back and look at our world, our planet, our government, our food supply, it makes me feel a little sick to my stomach. I know it’s important to stay up to date on the status of things, in order to be a good citizen in a democracy, but for the most part I prefer to focus on my family, and doing my best to raise kind humans that can tackle this crazy world we live in with love, kindness, confidence, and creative solutions for the problems we are facing.  I’ve been divorced for a little over 5 years now. That was the hardest thing I

Glimmers

Image
Have you heard the term yet? Glimmers. I’ve seen it a couple of times now. It’s like, the opposite of a trigger.  A trigger, sometimes referred to as a stressor, is  an action or situation that can lead to an adverse emotional reaction.  A glimmer, on the other hand, is something that leads to a positive emotional response. Instead of anxiety, or anger, or fear, positive feelings of peace, well-being and satisfaction kind of overtake you and it just feels good! I don’t know about you, but I could use more everyday life moments like that. Taking time to stop and notice these moments has been so life enhancing for me. I feel like I’ve been focusing on my problems for years; working towards healing past hurt and trauma, which, don’t get me wrong, has been amazing and it had to happen for me to really live a healthy, fulfilling life.  I’ve learned how to manage my triggers, how to reprogram my brain to think differently and therefore respond differently in stressful situations, and I’ve le

It’s a hard time of year

Image
I love the beautiful fall colors! I love the changing seasons. I love how beautiful the Pacific Northwest is and I know that is greatly due to all the rain we get.  But this time of year is hard for me.  The cold temperatures cause my body to be in a lot more physical pain than I am during warmer months (or in warmer climates.) Because of this, I stay inside and bundled up more often, and really miss having time outside. I also miss the light, not just the sunshine, although that is huge too, but the lack of daylight this time of year also weighs on my emotions. It’s like, despite my efforts, I’m teetering back on the brinks of depression this time of year and I don’t like it. But at least I have enough awareness and life experience to know that these feelings are temporary.  I can’t believe it’s been 7 years since we downsized, packed up our necessities, and ventured south to Mazatlan, Mexico for the winter. I’m so incredibly thankful that my family was able to have that experience an

The Process

Image
I have had the urge to make my chili recipe for about a week now and today I finally just decided that work can wait, I could use a little mental break anyway. With the October 15 deadline rapidly approaching, work has been a little stressful.  I spent a little extra time at the gym, then came home to do some cooking. As the meat was browning and I was chopping the green peppers and onions, I was thinking about how much we have lost the “process” of things in our culture. Everything is “processed” for us. Our clothing, furniture, homes, much of our food supply is made for us. The processes that use to take place in everyday life have been replaced with machines to do it for us. I remember when we first moved down to Mexico, and we had a house without a dishwasher, or maybe it had one, but it didn’t work very good, I don’t remember exactly, I just know that I washed dishes by hand for about six months, and I actually really enjoyed it. And I just had that similar feeling as I was choppi