36 Weeks

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Anniversary of my Dad's diagnosis

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Anniversaries help us to remember and acknowledge things in the past. They might not always be happy memories, but I do believe that remembering and reflecting is important. It was a year ago this Memorial Day that I found out my dad had cancer. Three weeks later he was gone.  These pictures were all taken about 2 years ago. We had no idea then that these would be the last memories with Grandpa.  I’ve wanted to write about his passing for some time now, but I just wasn’t ready until now.  His death has been hard for me to process in a lot of ways. I know death is never easy, and cancer can be a horrible way to die, so I don’t fault my dad for his decision. What I do wish in hindsight is that it wasn’t illegal in Idaho to end your own life, in cases of terminal illness. That’s the choice my dad made, rather abruptly in my opinion and like all grieving children I would have given anything to have more time with him. But I think he was afraid. I think he was afraid that he w...
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Day Care

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Jenica is going to daycare for the first time this afternoon. I think I'm having a much harder time with it than she will. The lady that will be watching her one day a week also watches my friend Brandi's son, so Jenica will get to play with Judah while she's there. There are also a few other kids that come on Thursday afternoons so I'm sure she will have lots of fun. I know I can't have the best of both worlds (stay at home mom and career woman), it's just hard to have to leave my baby girl with someone who doesn't love her like I do. It's times like these when I wish I didn't live so far away from my family, so Jenica could just spend an afternoon with her Grammy or her cousin Kayla instead of having to go to a strangers house. Rob and I have weighed the pro's and con's and feel like a little time with other kids will actually be good for Jenica right now and will allow me to focus on work with out worrying about what Jenica could be gettin...
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